When I talk about ‘margin’ I mean space or freedom…
Whether extra time, money, space, mental resources…we need ‘white space’ in life to give us breathing room to create, recuperate and regroup (you thought I was going to rhyme, weren’t you…I did too – resisted the urge though ;).
We need yin and yang, on and off – or else we always drain our batteries and end up with nothing left to give. All we will do is ‘do for the sake of activity’ versus doing consciously – with no questioning or conscious thought on the what it is we are doing.
Give yourself margin…time to think, stop doing and reflect.
My run…
Give yourself margin…time to think, stop doing and reflect. If you don’t take a bearing on where you are and pick out where you want to go…you will live without intention and end up going in circles.
We are now on our way home…which will be a very welcome feeling.
Our minivan (yes, we drive a minivan) is packed! We have no room to see out the back and are dealing with the standards, “I’m hungry, I have to pee, I’m thirsty, Hudson’s not sharing…”. Some people cringe at these thoughts. Children whining, a minivan, excessive roadtrip stops…and yes at times they can be a challenge but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
There are very few things I want for…except maybe more sleep ;). When I look at what we have it is more than enough. We don’t live opulently…simply is a better term. I don’t long after sportscars…a nice truck, maybe. My TVs are just fine, don’t need 4K yet.
I do long for me to be a better example to my children, wife and others…in leadership, integrity, fitness and generosity. I have a loving spouse, beautiful healthy children and a career that challenges me. So I would have to say that I have much more than I deserve or am entitled to, I know it and am thankful for it.
As your year winds down…we may not have all we want, but I hope this year and next finds you with all you need and more.
After the hustle and bustle of entertaining and making memories it is sometimes the ‘regular’ times that are the most enjoyable.
We skipped our workouts today so we can begin tomorrow or Monday…or at least that’s the story we’re sticking to ;). Today we slept in after a late night with yet another viewing of ‘Frozen’. All of my children still enjoy that…and to be honest so do I.
I think our lives are filled with enough drama and ‘brokenness’ that we don’t always need to pay to see what we do not want to happen…like adultery, broken homes, crime, violence, war, sickness, drugs and lives being torn apart. So these departures from our world are often welcome.
I sometimes get upset when we travel and I see the billboard signs that advertise ‘Adult Stores’. Where does that industry (and if you are in it, my apologies and no disrespect intended here) get off claiming that is what it means to be an adult? I understand and appreciate intimacy…we’ve got 3 little ones so I am good there. Why do we have films that are rated for adults that feature this same brokenness? Where are the aspirational aspects of our nature? Where is that featured?
Where are the stores that sell honesty, integrity, generosity, friendship, kindness, picking up those that have fallen and caring for the broken and in need?
And trust me…I am not a saint, I watch action films, play video games and enjoy them. But how much are we being programmed versus choosing from a menu that we do not create? Where can and do we start to shape in a positive way what we ‘choose from’?
For me and my family…we spent today playing chess, checkers, tickling our kids and spending time with each other.
I hope you get the chance to be as blessed as I feel and more. Have an amazing evening and trust me not all of my blog posts will be this deep 😉
Luckily my wife gets motion sick, not really lucky though, but I do benefit…as I rarely have to drive ;).
So I write from the passenger’s seat en route to our other set of Grandparents, my in laws.
This morning we woke up, both my wife and I, and did our first workout from Insanity: Asylum, Volume 1. So far it is not as bad as Insanity…but they do typically start slower and lighter and then pour it on shortly thereafter. I’ll keep you updated…as I am sure my opinion will change sooner than later.
We packed up, 2 luggage carts later, hit Dunkin Donuts for some very unhealthy donuts and coffee and are now driving to Irmo, South Carolina.
Yes that is a reflection of the donut box in the window. Our minivan is packed so at this moment we don’t really have room to put these in the back. My youngest is sleeping and the other 2 are watching ‘The Incredibles’.
I trust your day is starting well and finishes even better.
New tradition in the books. Personal plug for myself…I actually did complete Insanity! Took Christmas off, and will start ‘Insanity: Asylum Volume 1’ tomorrow a.m. before we head out of town on our way to see the other set of Grandparents. Gluttons for punishment? We just may be! We spent our Christmas with my parents at our timeshare on the ocean.
I taught my son, Tucker, and Father, Jack, how to play chess…which I love doing but rarely have anyone to play chess with! I guess this may be why all the family bands started. They probably loved music but with having kids rarely had time to play! -> Solution: grow your very own band! So it looks like I may be cultivating my own chess tournament.
I digress ;), and speaking of digressing, I often overuse the “;)” (wink & smile) emoticon…sorry I just can’t help it.
Today we had some issues, as one often does, with being a family. The Grandparents left early much to our chagrin after we opened gifts with the kids. We as our nuclear family regrouped, went to the beach for a walk, collected shells and admired God’s creations…and yes that includes seagulls.
All 5 of us, Tucker 7 & 1/2, Emma 4, Hudson 2, Pamela my wife (sorry age posting not allowed – the married people will understand) and myself, Todd 44 all walked and picked our favorite shells and rocks from the beach and readied ourselves for another tradition. That tradition was a prepared meal for our family provided at a VERY handsome cost, and luckily in our room (due to the fact we have 2 younger children 😉 (see told you).
Our shells...
After that we are here winding down with some chocolate chip cookies, a couple of beverages and some unhealthy end of year snacks searching for worthwhile television or shows to watch…and at this moment turned briefly to a show where a ship was swallowed by a monster, crewed by dead confederate sailors on the brink of being destroyed (I could not make this up if I tried).
As we try to wind down the evening I will try to get my wife to play her first ever game of chess as well…my concern is she is not a very good loser. I beat her in NHL Hitz on the XBox (IMHO one of the best hockey video games EVER!) and she never played it again! I need to tread lightly on this!
Have an amazing Christmas night…and I will let you know how Asylum goes tomorrow!
So today was my 2nd to last workout for Insanity. Yep, that’s right, that infomercial workout and let me tell you it is the best workout program I have ever done!
I have done personal trainers, workout apps and just regular workouts in the gym.
It was a big challenge for me but I can tell you I feel very accomplished! Tomorrow is my last day!
We, my wife and I, woke up early and did our workouts. Pamela did T25 and I did my Insanity then we hit the beach for a run. Ok…so some of it was a walk. When you are by the ocean and don’t live there all the time you stop and look at the wonders that we look past each day.
One tradition we started a while ago was collecting shells or rocks from out trips or outings and hikes. Today we decided to collect shells to put on a picture frame from a photo we take on this trip. So that will be our new tradition. I like to think of them as touchstones from our past…literally and figuratively.
I hope you have some great traditions or start some new and share them so others can make life more meaningful. Life is so fleeting and it amazes me what memories may have seemed so insignificant when they happened…but I hold on to them so many years later.
Have a great Christmas…mend fences, make that call that the grudge stopped you from making and have a bright Christmas and SAFE New Year,
So very much like his mother and father we all get ‘hangry’ (a.k.a. – ‘hungry and angry’) when our blood sugar gets low…at least he knows it when he is hungry 😉
So I sit here on a family experiement…a timeshare holiday. We have 3 kiddos, Tucker 7, Emma 4 and Hudson 2 and my parents, the Grandparents.
The idea was to have a beachy Christmas…as that is my happy place. Give me a beach and the sounds and sights of the beach and it just relaxes me. It puts me in my happy place.
So I am a bit of a ‘newbie’ at being beach aware. We rolled the dice for good weather and came up snake eyes! Cold, damp, rainy and gloomy…voila that’s what we have so far.
But we are writing memories that hopefully our kids will reflect back on. Writing new family traditions…I still remember the little things from my childhood as the best of times. That is what I am hoping our kids will get out of these ‘experiments’.
I hope you are writing great memories this season as well.
Todd C. Durkin's Blog 